From One To Two…

Since I’ve lived with two kiddos for nearly 4 months now, I figured it was time for us to chat about it.  Taking care of two is certainly different than taking care of one.  It’s more time consuming, more tiring, more work and yes, more difficult.  BUT, I do not say this to insinuate that my life is automatically busier than that of a parent that has only one child.  Someone with just one child (or even no child at all) might possibly be just as busy, if not busier, than me.  It’s not a contest.  All I’m saying is that for me, comparing life with one child versus now having two, things are pretty darn hectic at times.  My oldest is 3 and my baby is 4 months old.  I work a part-time job at my family’s business, therefore I am able to take the baby to work with me (not always an easy task, but still convenient).  I take care of certain things at home (my husband and I split things up pretty evenly).  And last, but not least, I try to keep up with my creative ventures – this blog, theater, acting gigs, etc.  We live near most of the grandparents, so that plays into our schedule on a regular basis, which is nice.  My 3-year-old is in preschool part-time, but the baby is with me every single day most of the time.  As you can see, my schedule is full, but not too horrible.  That’s the way I like it.  I like to have things going on and to have a routine.  But if there isn’t any down time at all, I get stressed.  Lack of sleep also stresses me out horribly.  But that’s getting better with the baby (thank god).  Since today was a Sunday, I was able to spend the entire day at home with both kiddos and my husband (whom spent most of the day doing algebra homework – no fun).  This is basically how our day went:
7:30am – 3-year-old comes into our bed and asks to watch Mickey.  Baby wakes up.
8-9am – Mommy feeds baby a bottle.  Daddy and 3-year-old go to pick up some breakfast.
9am – Breakfast!
10am – Baby takes a nap.  Daddy and 3-year-old go outside to do yard work.  Time for laundry.
11am – Baby wakes for bottle.
11:30am – 3-year-old is ready for lunch.  He eats a sandwich, crackers and grapes while watching The Sound of Music with Mommy.
noon – Time for Mommy to have lunch.
1pm – Baby takes a nap.  3-year-old watches Mickey while mommy runs 3 miles on the treadmill.  Daddy does algebra.
2pm – Baby wakes for bottle.  She’s cool with mommy being stinky and sweaty while feeding her.
2:30pm – 3-year-old wants to take a nap.  Doesn’t happen every day, but sounds good to Mommy.
3:30pm – Baby takes a nap.  Mommy works on organizing the closet.  Daddy is still doing algebra.
4pm – Mommy starts making spaghetti sauce.  Daddy takes a break from algebra.
4:30pm – 3-year-old and baby wake up (yes, there was a 1-hour time span where they were both sleeping – yay!).
5pm – Mommy feeds baby oatmeal and a bottle.
5:30pm – 3-year-old and Daddy eat spaghetti dinner.
5:45pm – Baby is done eating so Mommy eats her spaghetti dinner.
6:15pm – Mommy and baby leave to take 3-year-old to grandparents’ house to spend the night.
7:45pm – Back at home, Mommy gives baby a bath (yes, Daddy is doing more algebra).
8:15pm – Mommy gives baby her bedtime bottle.
9:15pm – Mommy puts baby to bed, then drinks wine.  :)
10pm – Daddy puts away the algebra and goes to bed so he can wake at 4am for work.  Mommy writes a new blog post.
11pm – Mommy goes to bed (hoping for 8 hours of sleep!).

WOW.  Seeing all of that written out is pretty wild.  But that’s life, right parents?  And if you’re not a parent yet or just have one so far, hopefully this paints a good picture for you on how a typical weekend day at home might go.  It’s certainly busy, especially with my husband taking a math class this semester.  But if we work together, we know we can do it.  We are always working hard on our children, our home, our jobs and our dreams.  Balancing everything is simply something that must constantly be tended to.  It takes a lot of effort, hard work and passion.  So far we’re handling things pretty well, and we plan on getting better and better.  Life is supposed to be an incredible journey.  That’s what we want for our kiddos and for ourselves.  As long as we have each other (and some wine), we’re ready to conquer this parenthood thing and have a good time doing it.  :)

I could go on and on about the difference between caring for one child versus two, but it’s time for bed.  We’ll chat plenty more about that later.  Cheers.  Goodnight.  Fingers crossed for some good sleep, right?  ;)

No Hitting!


I don’t like violence. I’m not a fan of super-violent movies. I cringe at the thought of someone physically hurting someone else. I don’t hit my kiddo when he’s in trouble. It’s something I feel strongly about (although I’m sure there will be moments when I feel like I want to slap a kiddo upside the head…hopefully I can take a deep breathe and not do it). So, anyway. When we were at Chick-Fil-A the other day I witnessed a little kid (probably 4 years old) hit my 3-year-old son, Rowdy, in the back. Rowdy was pretty clueless on what had happened. He kinda flinched and then turned around to see what it was. The hitter had already moved on to something else. I told my friend, “If that kid hits Rowdy again I’ll go hit him! Okay, I won’t actually hit him, but I’ll say something and find his mom!” So, go figure. He ended up hitting Rowdy again, basically two more times in a row. I quickly went into that play area, tapped that little boy on his shoulder and said, “No sir! No hitting! Where’s your mommy?” His big brother nearby immediately ratted him out with, “She’s right there. There’s our mom.” Typical tattle tale brother, right? Ha. And much to my surprise, their mom (whom was caring for a baby in addition to these two dudes) was getting up from the table to leave after witnessing our “playground drama”. When she and I crossed paths she said, “I saw it. I’m sorry.” I replied with, “It happened three times. Thank you.” Wait, what?! She apologized and made her kids leave? Wow. I would have expected their mom to be all defensive or maybe even ignore me. Hitter Boy must have some sort of hitting pattern. She didn’t seem shocked whatsoever. Either way, it was really cool of her to handle it like that. Meanwhile, Rowdy was oblivious to my Mama Bear behavior, playing and laughing with the other kids. Look, this may seem like I overreacted, but quite frankly, I don’t care. When it comes to something you feel so passionately about, especially involving your young child, you just react the way your gut tells you to. My gut told me to stand up for my kiddo and for what I believe in. He can stand up for himself when he’s older. But for now (and forever, really), mommy’s got your back.

The Big Brother


My oldest child, a beautiful 3-year-old boy, is truly a sweet, smart and unique little person. He’s kind, non-aggressive, loves his blanket and to cuddle. So when I was pregnant with my second kiddo (a now 2.5-month-old baby girl) I was sure that my son, Rowdy, would be the sweetest brother ever. I wasn’t shocked that he seemed overwhelmed and nervous at the hospital because he has a history of being bashful. There were lots of people in a small room where his mommy was on a hospital bed. That’s no fun for a little guy like him. Then the first time he saw her after the hospital she cried (of course), so he cried. I figured he would quickly come around when we got home, but that didn’t seem to happen. He acted nervous and bashful toward her, just like he acted toward all other strangers. She was, to him, a stranger, after all. He mostly ignored her, and certainly didn’t want to touch her, much less hold her. My hormones were still MAJORLY affecting my emotions. I cried a lot, mostly concerning Rowdy. I worried about his happiness. I was sad that he wasn’t excited about baby Romy. And more than anything, I was mourning the end of his only child chapter. I suddenly realized that he and I would do less things alone together, and that made me sad. But at the same time I was in love with my new baby girl. It was a crazy first couple of weeks, emotion-wise. But thankfully, it gradually got easier and my hormones began to calm the hell down. And even though I felt better and we were a generally happy and healthy household, Rowdy still wasn’t having much to do with Romy. It bothered me, but I was too busy to harp on it, which was probably a good thing. As the weeks went by, Rowdy would say more sweet things about the baby like, “aww, baby” and “needs bottle” when she cried. But the pivotal moment came just 2 days before Romy turned 2-months-old. My husband was sitting in a chair holding baby Romy when Rowdy suddenly walked up to them, touched Romy’s head gently and said, “beautiful” several times. My eyes got huge as my husband looked to me to make sure I was seeing what he was seeing. Then my husband, Ryan, told Rowdy, “Romy needs a kiss” and he kissed her head. Well sure enough, Rowdy followed suit and kissed her on the head 3 times. We were in absolute shock. This child didn’t even want to touch her the day before, and now he was kissing her head?! It was a beautiful moment that Ryan and I will never forget. We’re so lucky that we have gotten to witness so many incredible moments with our kids together (I mean, we managed to get Rowdy to take his first steps with Ryan watching from out of town via Skype – fate). Ever since that day, Rowdy has shown lots of love toward his new sister, and this mom couldn’t be happier. Witnessing this little person that has been our world for several years accept and love this new little person in our lives is most certainly the coolest part of this ride so far. Sure, he made us wait a couple of months, but those first 2 months of a new baby’s life are such a hectic, exhausting blur anyway, right?

I wanted to share this story to bring hope to any new parents out there that are going through something similar to what we went through. The disappointment and heartbreak I felt over this issue was no fun. And it proves that you just never know how your older kiddo is going to react to a new sibling. Even a sensitive child like mine wasn’t nurturing at all for a while. But the good news is that he came around (Rowdy does most things in his own time) and shows promise for a lifelong sibling relationship full of fun and love.